‘It’s not you, it’s me…’ The lack of meaningful feedback is frustrating the f••• …

The worst thing about dating is the rejection. Thankfully, I’m a happily married woman now so I don’t have to put up with being ‘ghosted’ or any of that ‘will they call, won’t they call’ shit.

But I remember it can be pretty brutal.

There’s often no rhyme or reason for getting knocked back. You just have to dust yourself off and try again, whilst desperately trying to keep your confidence intact.

All I’m saying is a little bit of feedback would go a long way. Something along the lines of: ‘You’re great but I just don’t think we’re a good match – I love camping, you’re more of a 5-star spa kind of girl.’ (You’re damn right, kiddo!)

You’d probably shrug your shoulders and say, “fair enough, I didn’t like you that much anyway”, before lining up your next date.

Millennials have feelings, too

Some people assume millennials must be used to getting short shrift when they put themselves out there. Au contraire.

A new survey asked them how the interview process could be improved and found that 59% wanted more feedback after an unsuccessful interview.

Employers should be listening to your calls for feedback. While you might not be right for the job this time, who’s to say that you won’t be perfect later down the line? If you don’t get any feedback the first time round, you might not bother coming back for another shot. And no one could blame you.

Kindness costs nothing

Can employers really afford to be this blasé about tech talent? I think not. There’s a tech skills shortage FFS.

Every candidate should come away from an interview with a positive view of the employer brand. But, sometimes, employers aren’t even gracious enough to give you a cursory call to tell you that you weren’t successful this time, let alone any decent feedback on how you could improve for the future.

You’re correct to demand more from employers; in fact, you’re doing them a favour, if anything.

If they can’t find the time to treat candidates with a bit of respect, what’s to say that they care for their employees?

“It’s not you, it’s me” is not good enough…

… and never will it be. Feedback should be personal, informative and helpful.

Ultimately, all you want is the truth – minus the clichés – and a nice bit of praise (if it’s genuine). Then you can set about securing that next date interview with a newfound confidence.